This is something I just can’t figure out. You hire a venue for your wedding, you pay them money, but what are they really providing you?
Do you expect your venue to know all the little details of your wedding day? Or is the role of a wedding venue simply that – a great looking location for you and your guests to enjoy?
As a wedding DJ that cares about the little things, it astounds me that so many venues or more to the point the venue staff simply see your wedding as another event, another job. While the majority of venues really do a great job of looking after their clients, there’s a few around Auckland and the rest of the country that almost act like your wedding is an inconvenience.
Listen for the red flags – perhaps staff using words like “usually” or “this is how it’s usually done here”, for example. It’s not uncommon for somebody at a wedding venue to “suggest” I set up a specific way, play music a certain way, or make announcements the way they’re used to simply because that’s what makes them comfortable. In my opinion, much of this comes from venue and staff simply not getting out enough. They only see weddings done their way at their venue because they don’t get to other locations. They simply don’t see anything different because they don’t know it could be different, or they are too busy looking after food and bar service to be creative.
It’s important to reiterate there are very few venues stuck in this rut, but they do exist. Also, I’m not saying I know better or best, in fact it’s almost the opposite. How can I or any venue be adamant that “this way works best” when your wedding is not like all the other weddings they’ve seen. “What we usually do” really isn’t relevant at your wedding, which I guarantee is nothing like any other wedding I’ve ever seen. How can a venue suggest you do what every other wedding does when chances are you’re not having everyone else’s wedding. It’s YOUR wedding, right? Nobody has ever seen a wedding like yours, so maybe you can do things a little different to what the venue might be expecting.
Cornwall Park Restaurant is a great little location. Dean who runs the place is one of those rare venue operators that just wants whatever you want and offers advice and enhancements, not rules and restrictions. Steve at Castaways is another example of a true service provider, someone who genuinely cares about each and every client, every wedding, and every detail. At the other extreme, there are venues who think everyone should feel privileged to even have their wedding at the location. Some venues can afford that attitude because they really do offer one of a kind scenery and facilities. Other locations don’t deserve to be involved in something as special and unique as a wedding.
The things they get up to doesn’t necessarily affect what I do as a DJ, so I don’t think this is personal. I just can’t figure out who died and made “the venue” the almighty wielder of all power at any wedding. I’ve heard of venue owners yelling at photographers because they got the wedding party back literally 3 minutes late. There are venues that will not allow guests into the dining area a few minutes early because “the schedule says 5:45, not 5:35”. I heard of a venue that refused to let entertainers get early access to set up and test equipment, instead insisting the bands or DJs roll gear in and sound check while guests were having dinner (what would happen if the gear failed??). There are even venues who tell brides that DJs must be approved by management before they can be hired! Sure, there are some dodgy Djs out there that are probably to blame for that kind of attitude, but can you imagine what the reaction would be if Djs told you that they need to approve the venue before you book…? 😀
Maybe I am a little biased, but I honestly believe many a wedding is restricted because of venue’s little rules or lack of care and attention to detail. The true creative potential and driving force behind weddings smothered because of a “it’s not how we normally do things here” stance from the some venues.
If you’re paying for a venue, what are you REALLY buying, and what is the venue actually doing for you? Are they helping you have your wedding day? Or are they just providing a room for your guests to spend the evening talking, eating, dancing and drinking? Are they looking after you, or are you doing THEM a favour by letting them even play a part in your big day? You chose the venue right? Not the other way around.
It’s your wedding – OWN the venue, set your expectations, and if they seem unable or unwilling to understand, decide what’s really important to you. It’s just a room, right…?
Rant over.
how true! Perhaps a better title woruld have been “service provider, or GOD?”. Having looked at nearly a dozen venues in the last year, i don’t know how many of them survive being so rude and arrogant. i think most brides don’t know that can and should stand up to these bullies.
Nicely put! 🙂
I agree entirely Nick and I concur with your comments about Steve at Castaways. He and his team just redefined the “nothing’s too much of a problem” concept. There are a few other venues I feel the same way about, having entertained all over the country in recent years. Stoneridge (Queenstown), The Portage (Marblorough Sounds), Terraces Hotel (Taupo), The Mission Estate, Old Church Restaurant, Te Awa Winery (all in Hawkes Bay), Duxton Hotel and Bolton Hotel (Wellington), Carrick Winery (Cromwell) and Victoria Hotel (Port Fairy, Victoria, Australia) all fit this description.
Like Nick, there’s a venue in Wellington (who shall remain nameless) that I prefer not to work at as they force clients to bend to their way of doing things. They are prohibitively difficult to deal with and they stop me from doing the best job I can for my couples, so I simply decline to quote on events at their venue.